Hi friends!
In case you haven't noticed, I consider anyone reading this my friend. I hope you will interact with me and leave comments so I can connect with you.
I am a very dramatic person. Dramatic with a positive connotation because perspective is everything right? ;) So for me...birthdays are not just a day of grand fun. Not just a day to celebrate. It goes deep for me. It is a bigger reflection time than the end of the year.
I think I am lucky my birthday falls in the Fall, because Fall feels like a more natural reset to me than January. January is in the middle of a season and I like to do resets by seasons not by months. Anyway, part of me has been weary to fully and happily accept this will be my 25th birthday. Because 25 sounds soooo much more responsible than before. When you hear someone is 25, you assume they're a pretty responsible well established adult who can take care of about anything. Well maybe a 40 year old would see them as young, but when I was 16, someone who was 25 vs 23 sounds very different to me. 25 sounds like the age of exiting the fun stage. And we all know that doesn't resonate with me.
Fun and irresponsibility are not co related in this scenario. It just seems like the 25 year olds start to be less likely to go play night games with the kids, to go play tag and jump on the tramp, to do spontaneous things. I don't want that to be me. Maybe I will intentionally do more young fun things just to ensure that I do not become a robot.
Being a robot is my worst fear.
As I'm sitting here with candles around me sitting on my yoga mat, thinking about what my day will bring tomorrow (I love birthdays so much and I am still debating between what to do. Book a massage, or not. etc. And if you're thinking 'do it its your birthday', you must remember my philosophy of massages is that you absolutely should not wait for an anniversary or an excuse to get a massage, you get a massage just like you change the oil in your car and I happened to get a massage last week lol!)
Anyhow...after some reflecting I thought...what if I flipped this around and thought of it in a new way. And then I wrote at the top of my list
"25 People Who Have Had a Profound Impact on Who I Am Today".
The list is extremely hard as you might imagine. I could write 100 people and keep going. So I tried to think of it in areas- church, teachers, music, professionalism, fitness, kindness, mindset, things like that as well as I thought of different stages of my life. I looked at a picture of me as a young girl and tried to put myself in her shoes and remember who influence me.
When I was little, I was very free spirited. I knew what I liked to do, and I liked having fun. I looked up to my cousins and the pretty older girls in my church just about more than anyone. I also believed in myself very deeply. As in, I believed I could grow up and do what I wanted.
One reason I may be reluctant to turning this age is because being the big dreamer I am, I am not even kind of close to where my 17 year old self journaled I would be in my 5 and 10 year plan. Like not even kind of. SURE I have absolutely done some of the major goals I had, and others that were on the list. So I definitely ought to make a list of 25 accomplishments- that is a good idea! I'll do that now.
25 Golden Milestone Markers/Accomplishments from My Existence on Earth
Moved to NYC at age 19 and went to school there.
Became a group fitness instructor and yoga instructor.
Became a hip hop dancer through perseverance in high school, and made the college hip hop team.
Got the composer of the Disney World show to compose my theme song.
Wrote, planned, casted, directed, choreographed a rap music video "Finally Free"
Went on a yoga goddess retreat to Bali in the middle of the semester.
In 5th grade I was Susan in Narnia and it jump started my love of theatre.
Trek was a very big event in my life- highly spiritual and highly filled with inner joy. I will include all my girls camps and youth conferences here.
Being in the musical at my University was such a good quality show and very fun.
Working with my voice teacher Jeff I made significant breakthroughs as a performer and a person.
Summer 2018 living in Maui. Healing, learning to relax, finding my feminine flow. Life changing.
Working at Walt Disney World. Enough said. You already know.
The first guy I dated-the entire time we were together was a dream.
At the time I thought singing the national anthem at a college Hockey Game was pretty cool.
When I started giving myself permission to believe I could go to events- my first women's entrepreneur event I went to started me on the path I am now.
My Bikrham yoga phase- changed my life.
My first retreat ever in Orcas Island drastically changed my lfie-first time I really learned how to feel in my body and not think in my head.
Seeing my first show on Broadway (Newsies) !!
The Forgotten Carols when Jeff McClean sang Three Kings Found the Lord and then Arise, I thought we were in the middle of the second coming. I have never felt that. power before.
Getting sealed in the Salt Lake temple- now that was actually the strongest spirit I have ever felt it was so strong I was sobbing for 2 hours straight.
Started a podcast and youtube show.
Sang princess songs as a princess at a Halloween pumpkin patch!
I freaking lived in Chiang Mai Thailand for a summer. That wasn't easy at all.
I have put on multiple concerts in my lifetime and I am proud of it. It started in my backyard when I was in high school, and since then I have done several more.
The thing I am the most proud of now is that I have learned to incorporate the Disney magic and not shy away from it because that is me- into my brand and social media messaging. What I mean is, I know EXACTLY what the thing is I have that gift I am able to communicate and portray the childlike belief that you may feel for 2 seconds when you are watching the fireworks at Disney. I have the ability to tap into that and STAY in that space so you have permission to stay in that space. And I know what it is. And it's hard because it is the most soft, the most vulnerable, and the most opposite energy of where we are in our day to day life. But instead of turning the other way and saying 'that's not cool, I need to do what everyone else is doing' I decided to lean into the Disney MORE.
Happy Birthday to me tomorrow!
XOXO
Annie
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